I am sure that most people have heard the term homosexuality at some point in their life. The term homosexuality was originally coined in the late 19th century to describe the sexual attraction between two members of the same sex. Now in the 21st century, a lot has changed. Sexuality is now referred to as sexual orientation. The term Lesbianism describes the sexual attraction between two females. Being a lesbian, I plan on focusing on female sexuality as I could personally relate, and connect to it better. As time advances more is learned about the origins of homosexuality. For many years this has been a controversial topic. The two most popular theories are genetics “I was born that way”, and environmental “societal, life experiences”. To this day the exact cause of sexual orientation is unknown, but there are many factors that are known to contribute to it. I plan to explore both of these theories as well as incorporating my own experiences on homosexuality that way I can offer insight to people.
A lot of people who are homosexual often describe their sexual orientation as something out of their control. Many people feel as if they were born that way and they are unable to change. Many studies have been conducted to test this. One popular study was conducted over 20 years ago by Dean Hamer. To test if homosexuality was genetically inherited, Hamer tested the families of 76 homosexual individuals. Observing that many more homosexual relatives are on the mother side of a family; Hamer decided to test the X chromosome. This X chromosome is often well known as the “gay gene”. Hamer performed a study with 40 gay brothers, and noticed that thirty three of the forty contained the same Xq28 gene. At first many people saw this as record breaking news; but when people were unable to replicate the study they realized it was more of a coincidence than a cause. Crewdson said, “I thought that Dean did a fine but small study, but if I had to bet, I would have bet against our being able to replicate it”(Crewdson). Since the study was so small there was a lot of room for error, and inaccurate data which explains the later failed studies. After many similar studies were performed and failed to replicate the results, researchers started focusing on more than one specific gene and started to focus more on the epigenetic’s the study of mechanisms that causes genes to switch on and off.
The new theory is that their are certain factors that affect women during pregnancy that can have affects on the child’s sexuality after birth. In Tuck Ngun’s 2015 study he tested 37 male twins who were discordant which means one who was gay while the other was straight, and 10 who were both gay. “He then analyzed 140,000 regions in the genomes of the twins and looked for methylation marks—chemical Post-It notes that dictate when and where genes are activated” (Balter). He narrowed these regions down to 6,000 areas of interest then used a computer model that would use data to form regions of sexual orientation. The best model used just five of the methylation marks, and correctly classified the twins 67 percent of the time. This is the closest scientists have come to prove homosexuality results from genes, however the results are not inconclusive. The study was very small which means the results could vary if the studied was replicated again. Ngun stated how with limited funding this was definitely a start. He states that he plans to conduct larger studies in the future. Epigenetic’s marks may be involved in sexual orientation, but it still isn’t proven that they are the cause of it.
Just because a single gene hasn’t been identified to cause sexual orientation doesn’t mean that scientists won’t find one in the future that will. Everyday scientists come further in their studies, and a lot more has been learned about the human mind and sexuality then was known years ago. If there is no gene that causes sexuality how can you explain that some people just know they are gay from a young age where as others don’t know until much later? When talking to a friend who is a lesbian, I asked her when she knew she was gay. She told me she knew for sure in the third grade. This was so surprising for me since I didn’t know I was gay until I was a teenager. She said she remembered playing with her friends and just wanting to kiss them. She described it like how many little girls have crushes on little boys; she felt the same way but towards girls. She said as she got older the feelings got stronger and she understood her sexuality more, but those initial feelings never changed. Taylor often says she was born this way, because no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t feel the same way towards guys. Taylor would often tell me that maybe there was a correlation since her father is gay. Is there really a genetic correlation or is it more of an environmental factor?
Growing up with a gay parent could have genetic influences on sexuality, but it definitely has environmental influences as well. Look at Taylor for example, her father was gay, and she grew up watching a relationship between two men; a first hand experience many children do not get a chance to see. My parents’ family friends are a lesbian couple who have two teenage daughters. Both their children teeter in and out of straight and lesbian pools. I think a big part of this is by growing up around it. It is normal for them to see two members of the same sex interact and have a monogamous relationship together. This makes a lot of sense, especially at a age when an individual doesn’t fully know who they are yet to be curious and experiment with members of both sex. When that child tries it either they know, or they remain in the undecided until they grow old enough to figure it out. There are a lot of other environmental factors that influence sexual orientation.
If you live in a community where being gay is not accepted upon, chances are you will not be comfortable with being out. In certain cultures, and religious backgrounds being gay is frowned upon and many people of those backgrounds often deny it. I had a friend in high school who was so obviously gay, but would deny it to the world for the fear of what her friends and parents would think. She was going through life so unhappy, and it made me so sad that she felt like she had to do this. I come from a town with very few gay people. People often associate homosexuality as a negative thing. On the other hand, in some places being gay is totally accepted. I have a friend who went to school with a whole group of gay people. Where she is from being gay is fairly normal.
Honestly, what is the harm in same sex relationships? Just because a “book” that was written nearly 3500 years ago says that it was wrong means we should follow it. Besides there are many reasons why we shouldn’t. Everyone sins at some point in their life, so who is to say what things people can and cannot do. My biggest issue is that people only paraphrase the bible and choose parts they want to listen to. The reasoning against people being gay back then, was that we needed men and women to be together so we could reproduce. With over 7 billion people in the world, I don’t think reproduction is a valid excuse anymore. What are we teaching our peers, children, and community if we are telling them to live life unhappily? We shouldn’t expect people to have to change who they are. If being with a member of the same sex makes them happy, then we should be supportive of it. It doesn’t affect your life. Being gay is already so unbelievably difficult so why would you want to contribute to the hardship that an individual must endure. I came out to my grandmother who is a really religious woman a couple of months ago. You could probably imagine how that went. It took me months to finally build up the courage to tell her. I planned out exactly what I would say and how I would say it. Once I told her she literally ripped me apart. She was very unsupportive and told me it was just lust, and that it is just a phase that I’ll grow out of. It was very hard for me that someone so important to me in my life couldn’t accept me for who I was.
Luckily for me many other people in my life are very supportive of me, and my sexuality. However, there are many kids who don’t have families or friends that are supportive. Being a teenager is extremely difficult for anyone, being a gay teenager is even harder. Many children who are gay that lack a strong support system often feel like outcasts, and alone. This is something no one should have to feel just because they are expressing who they are. The person you love is the same person they are regardless of their sexuality, and if you treat them differently that just reflects poorly on you. As a friend or parent you are supposed to support, and be there for your loved ones, not rejecting them. No one would choose to live the harder life, and if your child is brave enough to accept who they truly you are you should be able to accept them too. An individual can’t help who they are attracted to, and who they love. The world can be such a dark place, and it is hard enough for any individual. The diversity is what makes us all unique.
In my own personal experience I had no idea I was gay when I was younger. When I was a child I noticed girls were pretty, but never imagined being with them. I didn’t ever think of being with a girl until middle school when my best friend kissed me. Normally, that wouldn’t have been a big deal. My sister used to kiss girls when she was younger, but she is definitely 100% straight, but for me it meant something. When it first happened I was confused, shocked and feeling all sorts of emotions I never felt before. It happened again and once I got over the initial shocked I realized I liked it. My friend was ready to come out in seventh grade, but I wasn’t. I remember being so scared to be who I was because people are very unaccepting at home. High School is hard enough for anyone to survive, and I didn’t want the gay label hanging over my head as well. In High school I had a boyfriend for two years. I really loved and cared about him, but as like a best friend and not a boyfriend. When I came to college I really couldn’t be in the relationship anymore; I was so unhappy, so we broke up. I met this really pretty girl after, and it was the first time I actually acted on the feelings I had. I didn’t think about who would care, or what would happen I just followed my heart, and it was great. In our relationship I felt things I never felt with anyone else. It was the first time in my life I felt what it felt like to be in love with someone, and how strong and nice that feeling is. It took me forever to be able to openly talk about my sexuality without getting embarrassed.
Being much older and wiser now I fully accept who I am, and don’t look at my sexuality as a bad thing. I realized that just because I was attracted to girls it didn’t mean I still couldn’t be girly. I realized there is no criteria of what a lesbian has to look or act like. I hate that many people automatically assume that to be a lesbian you have to fit and look a certain way, and have a specific personality. Why do all lesbians have to be placed in the same category? Not every straight person looks, and acts the same so why does it change if an individual is gay? When we get down to it every person is different, and it is really hard to put every person into one label. Even now when I tell people that I am gay, they are very surprised and tell me I don’t look like a “lesbian”. Although it bothers me that the stereotype still exists I understand my sexuality enough to explain to them. I think if more information was available to people about sexuality more people would be less ignorant on the subject, and be able to understand it a lot more.
9 Questions Gay People Have For Straight People
Work Cited….
Brown, Dawn. “What Being Queer Is Like When You Don’t “Look Like A Lesbian”.”Thought Catalog. 2013. Web. 02 May 2016.
“Dean Hamer’s Argument For The Existence Of `Gay Genes'” 1995. Web. 19 Apr. 2016.
“Growing Up With Two Moms: The Untold Children’s View.” Public Discourse. 2012. Web. 19 Apr. 2016.
“Homosexuality May Be Caused by Chemical Modifications to DNA.” Science. 2015. Web. 19 Apr. 2016.
LeVay, Simon. Gay, Straight, and the Reason Why: The Science of Sexual Orientation. Oxford: Oxford UP, 2011. Print.
Robertson, Linda. “While Your Child Is Still Alive: A Letter to Parents Who Aren’t Ready to March in the Pride Parade.” The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com. Web. 02 May 2016.
The Atlantic. Atlantic Media Company. Web. 19 Apr. 2016.
marissaallyson 
I just love the personal element here, which makes the whole essay so engaging and helps me see the importance of acceptance regardless of whether the research leans towards nature or nurture. I wish there was a bit more of the research on nurture, where maybe social scientists have tested how sexuality is affected by environment? Would be curious to hear more about those studies, which must exist. I enjoyed reading this, and think your honesty in sharing your own journey really makes this essay come alive.
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There are also a few comments in Hypothesis (both public and grammarcheck). 🙂
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